Susan Bratton is a famous trusted relationship expert with a very large following. She has a fantastic personality, a warm voice, and intriguing expertise. She has done hundreds of captivating podcast episodes. Her knowledge across romance, relationships, libido, desire, arousal, sexual biohacking, masculine|feminine polarity, regenerative medicine, orgasmic potential, and passionate lovemaking cover a vast surface area.
Show Notes:
ABOUT SUSAN
I am a California woman
I am the CEO of my two companies that are both on wellness
I publish passionate love-making techniques and bedroom communication skills online, programs and books
Our work in my one company is to transform having sex into making love
What we focus on is heart connected, emotionally connected, love-making techniques for couples who want to have their sex life keep getting better over time instead of swirling down the toilet
Sex is good for you, it’s healthy, it keeps us young. It is such a great part of our health but we need people who can help us to keep it spicy, keep it fun and understands that women’s libido is very different than men’s and how the two can meet in the middle and have great, quality, satisfying intimate connection
My other company is a supplement company because I am about holistic, regenerative, natural health
I really love things that don’t require you on pharmaceuticals
So, I really like to give people all the best healthy things that they can do that are oriented toward their sexuality
I have this supplement company with a libido vitamin and a product that is a supplement for blood flow
You need blood flow for your brain, heart, and all your parts. And for women, we lose lubrication and for men, they lose their erectile rigidity and blood flow is the answer and I only have the organic blood flow supplement in the world made from fruits and vegetables
As we age, hyaluronic acid is also very good
I have a protocol and I call it my “skinspiration protocol”
Every day, I take a tablespoon of cod liver oil because you need healthy fats and half of the avocado a day and a couple of nut doesn’t go to get you there
I also take two different kinds of hyaluronic acid. I take a high molecular weight and a low molecular weight
The high molecular weight is good for your joint because it keeps them lubricated
Low molecular weight is very good for topical and taking in the mouth and that’s very good for intracellular hydration
The hyaluronic acid is what the body uses to hold the moisture on your cells
As you turn 40, all your hormones start to go down
I think the idea of putting topical stuff is great, but you have to hydrate from the inside out
It’s really important to model a good sexual relationship in front of your children
What I mean by modeling a good sexual relationship is, if he hears your making love, it lets him know that his parents still find each other attractive
Even if his initial hit is finding it disgusting, which is what kids natural reaction is especially with the teens and early 20’s – they are individuating
It is not your fault or theirs, it is actually the process of developing his own personality
If a kid hears you making love, it would let them know that sex is natural, good and done by loving people
What I hear most people to me, they’re upset when they come from a family when no one touched anybody, no one talked, no one kissed, no one showed or modeled any signs of physical affection
The seduction strategy with me is to just simply start touching my body and rubbing me without any expectation what is going to end up
Estrogen makes us women really out of our heads and it’s hard for us to just stop thinking everything else
We are so hormonally is cyclical even after menopause that sometimes we want but sometimes we don’t
What we really need is our man to just, “I got the bedroom ready, candles are lit, and I got nice music playing. I’ll meet you there in 10 minutes”
And so, like he makes me do it and I think for a lot of women, they want their man to be like, “we’re doing this now”
Because we can’t stop doing a million things we are doing
There are few women who don’t like their partners to be like that
That is what we need and that’s actually what I teach men to do
If we teach our husband to do those things and so, there isn’t going to be any rejection if he doesn’t expect sex
They have to stop doing something nice just to get sex from us (women)
If he’s just doing it for sex, then we won’t do it
If he does those things, you will start having more sex
The more sex you have, the more sex you want as a woman
Having not just sex, but what I like to call, erotic playdates
So many couples don’t have the sex they both want, so they should have an erotic playdate
There are a million things you can make up for erotic playdates
Women need a lot of fun and slow warm-up
For our male partner, they really need their Lingham pleasured a lot – just touch
Think an about the bullseye and he wants you to touch the center right away, you want him to start on the outside circles and work his way in overtime slowly – that’s the difference between masculine and feminine
A lot of times, we don’t touch him right away because we’re not turned on yet and he doesn’t get the amount of touch that he craves from us
OTHER WAYS TO INCREASE YOUR LIBIDO
For many people – all gender, hormonal replacement therapy is very effective. It’s not just for libido, but also for cognitive functions, neuroprotective against Alzheimer’s, cardiovascular protective
Bioidentical hormone replacement therapy well-tuned to the individual and a person will love it
You want to essentially have estradiol and estriol so that it pushes down estrone
I also take testosterone which is bio-identical and in both case, those are compounded in shea buttercream that I put intravaginally every day and I also take oxytocin in a gel intravaginally
Oxytocin is very good hormone that’s released when couples touched skin to skin
They call it the love bonding hormone of the love chemical
So that can increase your feeling of safety which is really nice and it also can help fluff up the vaginal mucosa again
Testosterone is the molecule of the drive including sex drive
Both men and women have it, but men have it more because women have estrogen
Having testosterone as a middle-aged and older woman keeps us not only interested in sex but interested in life. It is a vitality, it’s what gives you balls
For us women, having more testosterone will make us feel confident, more able to deal with life
The 3rd piece of hormone replacement that you need is progesterone and progesterone balances the estrogen
The estrogen and progesterone work together to balance together
I want people to know it takes a little tweaking
The woman that I like is Maria Claps
She does all her hormone replacement works remotely, but she is not a doctor
She helps you navigate and educates you on how to do your own hormone replacement
The blood flow supplement that I sell helps move your hormones around in your body so your brain is signaling from hormone release and it is able to tell how much hormone you have in your body
The vitamins that I have has boran in it and it is a mineral that you can’t make yourself in your body
Hormones are a part making you a libido, but not all
Blood flow is as important as anything
If you do not have blood flow in your genitals, you’re going to have lack of lubrication, UTI issues, bladder problems
Having your partner take their time and really get you to engorge so that you get plenty of blood flow in your tissue and vulva is really important
Blood flow is as important as hormones
A good gut microbiome is important so that you’re actually making your hormones
The vaginal biome is a part of your overall gut biome
Everything is just one big ecosystem and it all affects our libido because our sexual vitality is the other side of the same coin of our overall vitality
Sex is not about doing, it’s about being
When I teach guys that and they get out of that directed endgame mind and they just let go of the present, then they will give women the 2 things they want
One is that they are clean and well-groomed and two is emotional connection
That’s the energy and that’s what we want
With this virus right now, we could have it and not know it
So, we all going to do our part to stay in and kick this virus to the ground
That I think is going to bring us together as a country because it is a war against an invading virus
You got to feel what you feel. It’s scary but it’s okay but you must protect yourself and your family so the virus can’t infect other people
One of the most important things that we could do is to hold and be held
If you are quarantined alone, you’re going to do some things to self-nurture
Soulmate embraces is a very lovely way to lie down together, clothed or in pajamas
Arousal comes from relaxation
The foundation of arousal is sitting in a warm bath of relaxation
If you and he does not worry about sex and just comfort each other, you will find yourself draw sexually to your partner again because he is not pushing you to have sex, he is showing you that masculine polarity, he’s got you in his safe container, he is your protector and you’re loved